Dear Annie: The promise of a Cape Cod vacation is no reason to get back together with an abusive ex

DEAR ANNIE: My husband and I were together for nine years. During that time, we were married for 3 1/2 years. He’s 76, and I’m 64. When we were first married, I always questioned if he really loved me. I had moved to Florida in part because I felt he lost interest. So, I was shocked when he proposed.

He has been a sober alcoholic for 12 years now. During our first year together, I had numerous health issues. He took out a life insurance policy on me but made no provisions for me in his. He was controlling to the point that he wouldn’t let me eat things I wanted to eat or drink; he said I didn’t load the dishwasher correctly or fold the laundry right; I couldn’t hang pictures on the wall; he picked out my clothes for me; when I wanted to have friends over for lunch, he said no.