Dear Annie: One of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when I asked for a loan

July 19, 2023

DEAR ANNIE: I would like to add to your advice to the mom whose 22-year-old daughter wants to move into her own apartment. Based on past experience, “Distressed About Departing Dependent” is worried that her daughter will soon be asking her for money to pay rent, which she is unable to provide. Your advice was to support her in other ways, but “if she asks for cash, tell her no, and stick to it.” The baby bird needs to learn to fly on her own. Good advice, but wrong timing.

As a parent, landlord and former family financial counselor, I would say the time to have the “no cash” talk is well before the daughter gets all excited and signs a year-long lease. Combine that with helping the daughter develop a realistic spending plan (budget) so she will know what impact paying rent will have on her lifestyle — before signing a lease. There are excellent resources available in bookstores and online.

Dear Annie: One of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when I asked for a loan <body> <h1> Array ( [0] => sear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [1] => xear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [2] => cear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [3] => fear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [4] => rear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [5] => eear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [6] => dwar annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [7] => dsar annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [8] => ddar annie: one of the best things my mother did for 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annie: one of the best things my mother did for je was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [229] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for mw was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [230] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for ms was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [231] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for md was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [232] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for mr was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [233] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for m4 was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [234] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for m3 was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [235] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me qas to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [236] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me aas to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [237] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me sas to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [238] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me eas to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [239] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me 3as to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [240] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me 2as to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [241] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wzs to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [242] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wss to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [243] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wws to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [244] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wqs to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [245] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me waa to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [246] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me waz to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [247] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wax to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [248] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wad to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [249] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me wae to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [250] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me waw to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [251] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was ro say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [252] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was fo say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [253] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was go say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [254] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was yo say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [255] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was 6o say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [256] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was 5o say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [257] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was ti say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [258] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was tk say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [259] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was tl say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [260] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was tp say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [261] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was t0 say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [262] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was t9 say ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [263] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to aay ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [264] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to zay ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [265] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to xay ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [266] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to day ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [267] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to eay ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [268] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to way ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [269] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to szy ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [270] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to ssy ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [271] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to swy ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [272] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sqy ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [273] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sat ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [274] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sag ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [275] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sah ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [276] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sau ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [277] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sa7 ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [278] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to sa6 ‘no’ when i asked for a loan [279] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘bo’ when i asked for a loan [280] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘mo’ when i asked for a loan [281] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘jo’ when i asked for a loan [282] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘ho’ when i asked for a loan [283] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘ni’ when i asked for a loan [284] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘nk’ when i asked for a loan [285] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘nl’ when i asked for a loan [286] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘np’ when i asked for a loan [287] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘n0’ when i asked for a loan [288] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘n9’ when i asked for a loan [289] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ qhen i asked for a loan [290] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ ahen i asked for a loan [291] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ shen i asked for a loan [292] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ ehen i asked for a loan [293] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ 3hen i asked for a loan [294] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ 2hen i asked for a loan [295] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wgen i asked for a loan [296] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wben i asked for a loan [297] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wnen i asked for a loan [298] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wjen i asked for a loan [299] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wuen i asked for a loan [300] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wyen i asked for a loan [301] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ whwn i asked for a loan [302] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ whsn i asked for a loan [303] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ whdn i asked for a loan [304] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ whrn i asked for a loan [305] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wh4n i asked for a loan [306] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wh3n i asked for a loan [307] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wheb i asked for a loan [308] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ whem i asked for a loan [309] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ whej i asked for a loan [310] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ wheh i asked for a loan [311] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when u asked for a loan [312] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when j asked for a loan [313] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when k asked for a loan [314] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when o asked for a loan [315] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when 9 asked for a loan [316] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when 8 asked for a loan [317] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i zsked for a loan [318] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i ssked for a loan [319] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i wsked for a loan [320] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i qsked for a loan [321] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i aaked for a loan [322] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i azked for a loan [323] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i axked for a loan [324] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i adked for a loan [325] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i aeked for a loan [326] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i awked for a loan [327] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asjed for a loan [328] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asmed for a loan [329] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asled for a loan [330] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asoed for a loan [331] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asied for a loan [332] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askwd for a loan [333] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asksd for a loan [334] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askdd for a loan [335] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askrd for a loan [336] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i ask4d for a loan [337] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i ask3d for a loan [338] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askes for a loan [339] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askex for a loan [340] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askec for a loan [341] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askef for a loan [342] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asker for a loan [343] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i askee for a loan [344] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked dor a loan [345] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked cor a loan [346] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked vor a loan [347] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked gor a loan [348] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked tor a loan [349] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked ror a loan [350] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fir a loan [351] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fkr a loan [352] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked flr a loan [353] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fpr a loan [354] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked f0r a loan [355] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked f9r a loan [356] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked foe a loan [357] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fod a loan [358] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fof a loan [359] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fot a loan [360] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fo5 a loan [361] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked fo4 a loan [362] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for z loan [363] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for s loan [364] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for w loan [365] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for q loan [366] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a koan [367] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a poan [368] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a ooan [369] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a lian [370] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a lkan [371] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a llan [372] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a lpan [373] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a l0an [374] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a l9an [375] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a lozn [376] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a losn [377] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a lown [378] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loqn [379] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loab [380] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loam [381] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loaj [382] => dear annie: one of the best things my mother did for me was to say ‘no’ when i asked for a loah ) </h1> </body>